The true meaning of SIG

[sstevens@snap.ua.oz.au]

Hello Earth,

[Warning: long and potentially ridiculous post]

   I think I've got this Kate Bush thing bad.  Why else would I repeatedly
play the stuff I hate in the hope that I'll come to like it?  Many is the
night that I've gritted my teeth trying to get used to the demented airhorn
sound in "Not This Time".  Where did they get this from?  It's probably
a quaint ethnic instrument that Paddy discovered and just had to play,
little knowing that it was actually used not to make music, but to summon
goats.

   Anyway, my reason for writing is to put you poor people out of your
misery, and finally reveal the TRUE meaning of "Suspended in Gaffa".  As
this is considerably different from Kate's explanation of the song, I am
obliged to give a reason for why She would lie.  Quite simply, She didn't
want to admit that She'd written yet another song about sex.
   SIG is in fact a simple tale about a girl who is due to inherit a
considerable estate.  However, there is a clause in the will which says
that she only gets the money when she in turn produces an heir (thereby
ensuring the continuation of the family line).  But the girl and her
boyfriend are not yet ready to consummate their relationship.
   If at this point you are not saying to yourself "Ah! I see it now" or
"I knew it all along!", then read on.  I can explain every line of the song
in this context.  Here goes.

      "Out in the garden, There's half of a heaven":
The garden is Eden, and the rest of the line is the Snake's argument.
According to the Snake, they get the other half of heaven when they dispense
with the fig leaves.

      "And we're only bluffing, We're not ones for busting through walls":
The girl and her boyfriend are pretending to be more intimate than they
are.  "Busting through walls" is a reference to losing her virginity.

      "But they've told us unless we can prove
      That we're doing it we can't have it all":
"Doing it" is a reference to sex in its most blatant form.  Just saying
that they're doing it is not enough.  The executors of the will require
proof in the form of the production of a child, before they hand over the
estate.

      "He's gonna wangle a way to get out of it
      She's an excuse, and a witness who'll talk when he's called
      But they've told us...":
They tried to contest the will in court, but were unsuccessful.

      "I caught a glimpse of a god, all shining and bright":
She has preconceived notions about the sexual act, expecting it to be like
a religious experience.  Later, as she comes close to "doing it", she is
worried that these expectations might not be fulfilled:
      "Mother, where are the angels?  I'm scared of the changes"

      "Suddenly my feet are feet of mud, It all goes slo-mo.
      I don't know why I'm crying.  Am I suspended in Gaffa?":
Plainly she is not yet ready to "do it".  The precise meaning of "Gaffa" is
irrelevant to the overall meaning of the song.  Suffice it to say that it
is something in which one can be suspended, in either a physical or
temporal sense.

      "Not until I'm ready for you Can I have it all":
This line is sung to her boyfriend.  She can't have it all until she is
ready to make love to him.

      "I try to get nearer, But as it gets clearer,
      There's something appears in the way":
As she gets closer to her boyfriend, and the consummation of the
relationship, she faces some mental resistance brought on by sexual
anxiety.  The form of this anxiety is described by the two bible
references:
      "It's a plank in me eye, With a camel, Who's trying to get through it"
The meaning of these words in the context of the song has nothing to do with
the meanings of the phrases in the bible from which they are derived.  Quite
simply, "plank in me eye" refers to fear of bodily invasion by something
long and hard, and the (large) camel attempting to get through the (small)
eye of a needle likewise refers to doubts and anxiety about the mechanics
of the sexual act.

      "Am I doing it?  Can I have it all now?
      I pull out the plank and say Thankyou for yanking me back
      To the fact that there's Always something to distract 
      But sometimes it's hard To know if I'm doing it right
      Can I have it all now? ... We can't have it all":
Common sense tells her that her fears are a barrier that can be overcome by
refusing to be distracted by them.  However, there is another barrier in
the way, and this is her astounding sexual naivity, evidenced by the lines
"Am I doing it?" and "its hard to know if I'm doing it right".

      "We all have a dream ... maybe":
Her dream was of a romantic, heavenly deflowering.  Now it seems so unreal
that she begins to doubt she dreamed it.

      "I won't open boxes That I am told not to. I'm not a Pandora.":
The reference to opening boxes is another fairly obvious sexual metaphor.
This line also reveals the key to understanding her sexual anxiety and
ignorance.  Her religious/puritanical upbringing has told her that sex is
wrong, and that giving in to lust has dire consequences, like the opening
of Pandora's box.

      "I'm much more like that girl in the mirror
      Between you and me She don't stand a chance of getting anywhere ...
      No, not a thing":
Upon confronting herself she comes to accept the way she is.  She won't be
forced into something she doesn't feel ready to do, just for the sake of
money.  This positive note is soured by the implication that her abstinance
makes her feel inadequate and unable to succeed in life. 


   So there you go.  I can't help but think that this makes more sense than
the official interpretation.  Also, don't you find it strange that a song
which is supposedly deeply philosophical sounds so jolly?

   Finally, perhaps someone could ask Kate if She's heard of a 1947
Associated British Pathe film called "Blowin' the _Gaff_".  Coincidentally,
this movie is about a young Catholic girl who stands to inherit a large
estate from her eccentric great aunt, on the condition that she marry.
Its cinematic release was abortive, due to a poor script and worse acting.
The cast were complete unknowns, aside from a brief cameo by Mickey Rooney.
   It is rumoured that a rare print of this film resides in the private
collection of _Terry Gilliam_.  Strange phenomena...

Selwyn.
sstevens@crackle.ua.oz.au