HOOO Boy, *NOW* You've gone and done it...

[drukman%UMASS.BITNET@wiscvm.wisc.edu (Jonathan S. Drukman)]

All right Mr. Greg Earle, you OBVIOUSLY don't know a single thing
about sarcasm (implied or otherwise) or humor OR how me & my good
buddy Joe Turner operate, particularly in this electronic forum.  Let
me take your points in order.

> So you all spout off about how Skinny Puppy was `silly', `needed a
> better mix', `spastic', `did ... a whole mess of other really
> meaningful acts', and they did not `have any of the really gory stuff
> that I wanted to see'.  You turn around and say `Go see them but
> stand back'.  Make up your minds.  

First off, I absolutely adore the one album I own of theirs ("Bites").
I've been playing constantly and I really enjoy it.  This is a direct
statement, no sarcasm here.  It's a great piece of work.  The bad mix
and sillyness that we are espousing comes from the show itself.  I wish
(and I know this is a really silly and juvenile complaint) that it sounded
more like the album.  Now, don't take that the wrong way.  They are a
dynamite band on vinyl, but the show I was at butchered it!!  It sounded
like Art Of Noise drums minus anything coherent except for Nivek's
screaming.  Where were the neat vocal samples?  The intricate synth riffs?
EVERYTHING was totally lost in the INCREDIBLY SHODDY MIX.  I assume
you were not at the show, so please don't presume to lecture me about what
I saw and you didn't.

> By the way you're BOTH wrong, singer's name (stage name) is Nivek
> Ogre (real name is Kevin obviously) not
> whatever-the-hell-you-garbled it-into.  Also, calling Cevin Key a
> `heavy metal reject' just shows your ignorance.  Not only does he
> NOT look like any heavy metal band member [...]

Ok, we got the name wrong.  I admit it.  On the tape of "Bites" that I
have, incidentally, the guy is listed as Nivek ORGE, not OGRE.  Probably
a misprint.  But as for cEVIN Key looking like a `heavy metal reject'
you were NOT THERE!  He looked like one to me!  This is NOT a swipe at
his playing, which was dynamite (what little I could hear, other than the
pounding percussions).  But he had the requisite long spiky blond hair and
sleeveless t-shirt that would not have looked out of place in (shudder)
Bon Jovi.

> He *is* one of the most intelligent, sincere, and thoughtful people I
> have ever had the pleasure to meet.  In addition he is a great musician.

I'm sure he is, but what's the point?  He _looked_ like he could have
walked out of a heavy metal band to me.  He didn't _sound_ like it,
but he _looked_ like it.  All right?

> [...] `heavy metal reject' just puts *yourself* in a bad light,
> because you don't know what the hell you're on about.  Saying Nivek
> Ogre can't "sing" is ludicrous; they purposefully distort the vocals
> for a reason.  I'd love to have seen you review the Cabaret Voltaire
> fall

Hmmm.  Why does reporting what I saw put me in a bad light?  If I say
someone looks strange, that makes me strange?  I dunno...  I don't
recall saying that Nivek Ogre can't sing... Maybe Joe Turner said
that, could you possibly repost a quote or something to back this up?
If I did say it, I apologize for losing my mind momentarily.  I love
the effects, distortion, digital delay, etc.  It's not really
"singing" but it sounds neat!

> I'm amused by your obvious biases towards what you expect from a
> concert.  Does everyone in a band have to `have fun'?  Why did you
> expect to see `the gory stuff', is this your idea of `entertainment'?

Well, we expected to see `the gory stuff' cos :>oug told us that they
showed it!  He said it would have been some of the most disturbing
visual images we would have had ever seen.  (Apparently they run a
film of a zit being lanced by a razor blade in close up over and over
again, but it was not shown at the performance we attended - no
explanation).

> stick.  Try *thinking* about what you saw, instead of just making
> cursory dismissals, and perhaps you will be the more enriched for
> it.

If they are about as "subtle as a blunt stick" (as you put it) why should
we have to think that hard about it?  You're contradicting yourself in the
same three lines!  Why should I take anything you say seriously?? (That was
sarcasm by the way, seems people around here need it pointed out.)
Anyway, you missed the point totally.  I like the band a lot.  Their
stage show was very silly and overblown.  I found myself laughing at their
antics at times.  I still enjoyed it, although my enjoyment was ruined
by the bad sound mix.  OK?  Kapish?  Good.

> In case you were wondering who Mr. Pretentious Edward Ka-Spel is/was,
> he was/is in the Legendary Pink Dots, and also forms one half of The
> Tear Garden along with Cevin Key (also real name Kevin obviously).

Is this relevant?  Does it matter who he is?  I saw him as a total unknown,
and was not impressed.  If you think I should have been more impressed
had I known who he was, then you've got some strange ideas about how to
appreciate music.  It doesn't matter, I presume, how bad it is, as long
as it's performed by someone with a distinctive past?  Fine.

Sorry if I'm coming off a bit of a jerk, but you've really got some
odd views here.  I seem to be having a problem with people
misunderstanding my postings.  Maybe I should post a little capsule
summary at the bottom of them from now on?

OH yes, One very important KTKTKTKTKTKTKTKT question for anyone still
reading: Is it really true (as :>oug claims) that "James And The Cold
Gun" live from the "On Stage" and "Kate Bush" EPs is the SAME version
in the Hammermsmith Odeon video??  It doesn't seem like it...

--Jon Drukman