a potbellied plethora of wicinski like ramblings

[Jim Hofmann <hofmann@AMSAA.ARPA>]

***SHOW REVIEW***

Saw the Descendants last Friday - I have now coined the phrase fusion
hardcore for their style - though I can't figure out fusion with what??

Their new songs feature some pretty intricate manuveurs heretoforunseen
in the generic world of punkland - I tried to keep time until I realized
they were playing with oddly metered measures, I haven't heard that since
Etherteen (you heard of them, Greg post-76?) did that funky 7/4 song about
yellow floaters.  Oddly enough or not, the offbeat time is perfect for
thrashing and I'd like to see other bands pick up on it ... I'm afraid
however most would say, huh? 7/4/??? 5/4??/ and sometime I wonder if
Etherteen knew what they were doing ... Nevertheless, Dave Brubeck would
probably dig it.

Other bands that played (4 for 6$!!!) were LUDICHRIST (I bought their $4
dollar tape) who played in that NY-R Rad -Reagan Youth intensity and
political leaning - threw out zillions of stickers, frisbees.  Someone
brought their teddy bear and threw it into the thrash pit - and the kids
loved it so much they tore off it's appendages.

Opening up were the anarchaic Flag of Democracy who played about 5 songs
over their agreed upon time borrowing a bassist from Ludichrist since their
regular died or was incarcerated.  They could really be "good" and they know
it - however they preferred to piss off the audience with dinosaur guitar
jams and drum solos ( Descendants had a couple of drum breaks, too but
Stevenson is like god you know so it was okay). Metalish when they aren't
a joke band.

Second band was the Lil Gents - a bit on the Mod/Who side
for me (even dressed like mods!) feature yet another Big Young Fat Dude
on vocals.

The Descendants got one of the most loudmouthed assholes doing their
merchandizing, bouncing, strongarming ... every girl he saw he asked
if she would want to give him, uh, oral, you know, sex --- I guess
sooner or later that strategy is bound to pay off.  I though Milo
was a roadie until he started singing and the other guy with the
skinhead was in the band.

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Came back on Saturday Night to rewind my VCR (fuck you I won it as a doorprize)
and catch the first (I think), Hardcore (sort of) band on national television ..
I'm talking 'bout that fab performance by the Replacements on Saturday Night
Live.  They sure showed everyone that DIY is alive and well.  The second
song, On the Bus, proved it wasn't as wimpy as the vinyl indicated - YAH, RAH,
Long Live the 'Mats!!!!

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As I sat there in amazement and a general Saturday night stupor a Dick Clark
produced show came on to wash away the raw puke left by the Mats with an
anti-septic display of music YOU WANNA HEAR (or so Dick sez) ... the next time
I see my buddy Dick I'm gonna fuck him up the ass with a razor blade.

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Well, my recording career is starting as I've been informed an inheiretance
(oh you cruel, heartless bastard!) will leave me with enough money to
invest (!!HAH - we're talking serious here) in a Tascam Porta One Four track
and microphones - stay tuned.  My bands are called Mental Picknick, Smart
People in Car Crashes and The Appropriate Soda (and if any of you fucks steal
my names I'm gonna sue, I SWAR, Billy Bob)

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Maximum Rock and Roll is a commie/leftist propaganda rag - you can tell this
when you send them a dollar (and no money for postage) and they still send
you their disgusting slimey publication - they are obviously underwritten
by the USSR.  
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SONIC YOUTH will change my life once I take out the earplugs
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Wankers make good lovers

							hofmann