Dinosaurs trample the ground while insects burrow down...

[Jim Hofmann <hofmann@nrl-css.arpa>]

> Subject: The last word on J.D.-bashing

>To Wicinski and Hofmann:

>After all, why would the two feel so compelled
>to continually lambaste my reviews unless, deep down, they
>believed that

>A) I know more about music, on all levels, than they; or
>B) I am usually right.

To Considine:

Nah, it's the things you say - the attitude you project sometimes... if you
want to play ROCK MUSIC TRIVIA sometime, I'm game - you bring the chip n' dip
and I'll bring the beers.  Yeah, I know you've been around the block 
a couple of times but you seem to be getting dizzy as of late.  Who's this
Eric Clapton fellow, anyway?  Has he put out anything recently that I can
sink my teeth into?  If not, why is he getting interviewed for the umpteenth
time?  Seems to me Lee Renaldo has more to say about state of the art
musicianship than Eric.  Guess you've just been around the same block 
together, eh?  Oh, your editor made you do it, huh?

>I therefore suggest that they lay off Sue, and confine their
>whingeing to the "Post"'s letters page, like real men.

Welll,  saaar, we's wuz just bad widdle boyz an' wuz jest waitin' fo
de man to lay down de law on us...

More Random Queries:

Just curious, how much are YOU gonna net offa Bruce's new opus?

Seriously, really enjoyed your appearance recently on PBS telling all us stupids
what a lame music scene we have because of the "poor quality" of the recordings
and how "expensive" it is for Dicky Gammerman to book local acts (a crock of
horseflydroppings if you acks around) ... methinks you sided with Gammerman
for political reasons, yasno?  

Oh by the way, is it true that Sammy Hagar doesn't get any poontang?

> -J.D. Considine


Tim, just be happy that these folks don't sue you.

Pleading Immaculate Conception myself,
  -J.B. Hofmann

Furtherlessnote:

This "conversation" betwixt Suzan and Timmy is a riot, it seems
like both of what you dopes have to say boils down to battening down
the hatches and yelling "trendy!" across the trenches at each other.  

Isn't it strange how something as wonderful as music can divide people
so?  Well, this leads me to some intenso introspection on the Pussy
Galore EP  (it's a 0 on the Sue scale and a 10 on the Wic scale).

-=-=-=-=

Pussy Galore 12" - Eat Fuck Kill, can't remember the name and it's 
inconsequential at this point anyway.  About 7 lessons here in how to
take what appears to be your above standard crunch drawing from the Cramps
to Scratch Acid into a slow degeneration until nothing recognizable from
the original riff is present... at least in most of the songs.  One song
that stays almost on the tracks is "You Look Like A Jew" and y'know if I
was rock crit, I'd probably write that off right away as racist,"peurile 
blatherings", y'know? but I'm not so I've got time to think about these things. 
Anyway, after I played the side with that song, I ran an errand in my tape-
playerless car (too bourgious, donchaknow?) and ran through the cacophony of 
radiation stations to see if ANYthing could match that bone-cruncher... opened 
up with the local prog-rock (y'know, the first to play the Woodentops?) station 
- HFS and they were playing something that sounded like Karla Bonghoff  with a 
cumload of syrup down her throat (turned out to be Suzan Vegen or somthing... 
what do I know about music?) then pedaled over to DC101 and of course, there was
a commercial playing... then onto CVT (the last surviving college radio "rock"
station...) in which some lisping pud was repeating what I.R.S.'s latest 
"geniuses" laid down on him at the Cat Club last week and realized that NONE of 
these stations would EVER play "You Look Like a Jew" even though it could 
musically hold it's piss with any of them.  CVT's common excuse is that the 
record company "never sent any promos" which doesn't bother them when they're 
out buying up the latest and greatest from the UK... HFS probably frowns a bit 
on the whole  "vanity label" trip (still) that Dave Mersh warbled about way back
(the guy probably would have put down the Gutenberg Press, too) and DC101 would 
just laugh in my face.  Mainly, though I guess the title and the whole attitude 
of a group that puts out an EP called Groovy Hate Fuck is gonna P.O. any career 
minded programmer dude...Now, had the song been called, "You look like Kadafy", 
I'm  sure DC101 wouldn't have HESTItated (providing, say, Columbia or MCA was 
hawking it with the nose candy gravy train)and the Post woulda hired some hack
to write the human-interest angle up.  So what does all this "puerile 
blathering" mean?  Well, it's just that people will be offended by the "Jew" in 
the title whereas they WOULDn"T be offended if it was "You look like a 
Fundamentalist Christian" (Unless of course your name is Ed Meese).  Why?
Ask your local JDL, I don't know WHY...

The Pussy Power people are working on a new one on Buy Our Records...

-=-=-=-=
Speakin' of Buy Our Records, I also picked up the new Adrenalin O.D. lp,
which appears to be WAY overpriced (7.99 at the store and 7.00 through
the mail...), sigh, another "indie" becomes a "spendie".  Still, I'm
a sucker for this band but can't say I'm too impressed with the total
sum zen experience from this LP... shoulda cut some of the fastashitthrashwith
funnylyricsyoucan'tunderstandwithoutthelyricsheetthrash down to about two
songs, kept the Mouret and Surfin' Jew covers and some of the more melodic
and "experimental" cuts and released a 12" (seems to be the way to go these
days) instead.  I mean, some of the targets they've chosen to pummel have
been pummeled so many times ("Yuppies" and Urban Sprawl) that the stock
piles of ammo are overflowin'.  Still, I don't think their fans are gonna be
disapointed and as they point out in the reasons "we are cool", "we haven't
gone speed-metal"... but then again, they also cop to owning a video copy
of "the Breakfast Club" and list Tad Martin of ALL MY CHILDREN as a primo
influence.  Are they b-holes or what?

-=-=-=-=-
Finally in the hardcore ghettoes of your local geeky record store, check
out the latest from Deeschord, i.e. the Gray Matter "Take It Back" 12"...
infinitely leaps and bounds above the preceding Dischord Release by Dag
Nasty, this is yet another entry in the Kentucky Derby of Punks w/Lotsa
Metal Influences of which Die Kreuzen and Poison Idea are fairly solid
contenders.  Still, there's alot more going for this than just that (as
if it weren't enuf, dudes) with some hard pop phrasing built around
the heavily slagged "Emo" (as in Emotional) Core lyrics which came into
fruition with the Rites Of Spring LP of last year of which you wouldn't
be too far off in filing this record right next to (doncha jest love
these run on sentences us amateur crits get into?).  Still, why the
so-called "big-time" rock crits aren't trumpeting the fact that the Ian
MacKaye-Don Zientara producing/engineering team is the best of the f-ing decade
is way beyond me.  Guess it ain't cool or something.  4$ from Dischord.